Polaroids: Autumn in Kaulsdorf

Kaulsdorf is the first place I lived when I moved to Berlin in September 2009.  It’s a small village outside the city. There are two lakes near my old home and I used to regularly go for long walks around them.   My four months in Kaulsdorf were an amazing time for me.  I often joke that I didn’t really come alive until I was 26 – the time that I moved to Kaulsdorf.  A five and a half year relationship was dying a slow and painful death but at the same time I was just discovering what the world had to offer outside of Australia, finding my independence and exploring my creativity.  I lived in a single room in an attic.  When it got colder the landlord would leave coal outside my door everyday to light the fire.  It was there that I saw real snow for the first time (apart from once when I was a baby apparently).  My sister recently sent over some of my Polaroids I’d had in storage and I found these amongst them.   They were taken around the lakes and Kaulsdorf fields when Autumn was starting to show itself.  I remember the air had a beautiful cold bite to it.

Last Polaroids in the Camera

23rd August 2012, original Polaroid on expired stock

Polaroid production ceased in February 2008 – a sad time as I have completed a number of projects in the medium.  I love so many things about Polaroids, particularly the 600 film – their instancy, how there’s only one of them, their size – how they can be held in your hands (so intimate), their transcience – how they fade over time, their fuzzyness – how they look like dreams, and their volatility (please don’t shake them too hard).  I have five unused shots left in my Polaroid camera.  The film expired a long time ago, meaning that the images come out a little greeny-brown, but I don’t mind that as the images will be just for me.  If I don’t use them soon, nothing will come out on them but brown muck.

My sister is visiting me in Berlin at the moment.  It definitely felt like a Polaroid moment as she was sitting on my kitchen bench after an afternoon of good chats.

What I’ll use the last five shots for, I’m not sure yet…